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Showing posts from November, 2015

''Syndrome of the wrong train'': city nights and unexpected encounters

It’s been going on for so long. I still don’t know if there is a clinical definition for this particular mental disorder... anyway, it doesn’t really matter: I call it '' syndrome of the wrong train ''.
Mine is a rare case, extremely serious, almost incurable. Everyday, I pay a high price for this kind of mistake and it has often dragged me into dangerous and unpleasant situations.
More than once I found myself having to wander alone in dark and isolated streets in the middle of the night. But the real problem lies in the fact that the night in the city is not like the night in a quiet Italian village: the streets are emptied and all the men in suits and the elegant ladies in tailleurs are sucked into a vortex that inevitably culminates in a nice central apartment or a dirty old hovel in zone 4.
The night is like a filter: the figures of the day are dissolved in a smokey cloud and those who stay in the streets are nameless and homeless people: pale and hollowed faces wh…

13th of November 2015: Paris, nous sommes avec toi

You know, now I understand those who say that hate only generates hate. I didn’t think it was possible. It’s a legend, a common saying, a fairytale - I thought. It could never happen to me – I said. I have my idea of Hate; a precise, real idea and therefore I did not think that I was immune to it. I am a man, like everyone else, not a superhero. But suddenly all the ‘’improbabilities’’ have been cancelled after the overlap of those remote factors that, when put together, made me feel like I’m feeling now.
And what I am feeling now is something new: not unexpected, rather different than how I had imagined it. It’s bigger than indignation, fear, disappointment. Rage is a feeling that I thought I knew: an unrestrainable impetus, yes, but I always thought I was able to handle it.  It had always been a remote hypothesis, a human tendency that had never found fertile ground in me.
But this time I can’t. No, it’s too big. I can’t describe it. I can’t quantify nor qualify it.
I do not hate. I …